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Things You Never Want to Hear at a Funeral

Steve Artressia

Yesterday we talked about that family who scattering a loved one’s ashes while listening to Spotify. They had their own solemn ceremony interrupted by a commercial for a constipation treatment. So add “farts” to today’s list of:.

The Top 5 Things You Never Want to Hear at a Funeral.

#5) Before we stick him in the ground, anyone want to play “Weekend at Bernie’s”?

#4) SURPRISE!  I’m not dead!!  And I heard everything all of you whispered about me . . . and you’re ALL out of the will!!!

#3) I know caskets are expensive, but a Hefty bag is kind of tacky.

#2) YOU’RE the deceased’s wife? Wait, so am I!

And The #1 Thing You Never Want to Hear at a Funeral . . .

#1) What do you mean “there’s a cover charge”?!