The “Poster Child” For Stupid Criminals?

“The wheels came off” can mean you failed spectacularly at something . . . or it can be more literal. A drunk driver in Connecticut was so hammered on Saturday, he didn’t realize he was missing a tire. Someone called the cops around 11:00 Saturday night, saying a car on I-95 was driving on three wheels and was “all over the road.” Cops caught up to the driver and confirmed the missing tire. They said his car was emitting, quote, “large plumes of smoke while in motion.” He was only going 30 when they first spotted him, but sped up to 70 when they turned their lights on. But two cop cars boxed him in and got him to stop. He eventually admitted he’d been drinking and smoking weed, but despite all the smoke (both outside and probably inside the car), they said he was “unaware” he’d been “driving on a rim.” He’s facing a DUI charge, plus additional charges for reckless driving . . . Disobeying an officer . . . Failure to maintain a lane . . . And operating a motor vehicle with unsafe tires. (They released his mugshot and didn’t mention this, but is that puke on his shirt? If not, he ate a whole lot of Cheetos and didn’t have a napkin)