How Much Wood Would A Woodchuck Chuck?

We talked about this about a month ago, scientists at the University of Maryland are hoping to find out, how often we fart. Scientists created a tiny wearable device that clips onto your underwear that tracks how often people fart. They’re rolling out the nationwide ”research gathering” stage of the study. Something called the “Human Flatus Atlas.” Volunteers wear the device for 3 days, so researchers can gather the data. Early results show a huge range, with some people passing gas 4 times a day, while others reach about 175 (that breaks down to a toot every 8 minutes . . . and maybe a recommendation that you cut back on dairy). The doctor leading the study is stoked about the progress so far, saying “We’re in the unknown here, and it’s always an extremely exciting place to be” . . . but maybe several feet back (. . . okay, I made that last line up).